Hand jobs and blow jobs are called jobs because they’re tedious and dicks are gross. Going down on a girl is called eating out because it’s a privilege.

(via gunz4hands)



ok but give me one good reason why you wouldn’t date Kermit the frog besides that he is a puppet and a frog

I can’t beat Miss Piggy in a fight. She’s very strong and knows karate.

(via the-dalek-in-221b)


Gotta raise up that Gay-Point-Average

(via the-dalek-in-221b)


so i watched scott pilgrim vs the world again last night and the fact that im still picking up on things that i never saw before astounds me, like in this bus scene after the fight with matthew patel there’s a fucking bokeh filter on the front of the camera so when ramona is on screen all the out of focus bits are rendered as little “x”s and scott’s bits are little love hearts but when scott asks ramona if they’re dating now there’s a little ding from the bus as ramona’s turn to hearts like omg

the amount of attention to detail edgar wright puts into his films is absolutely baffling to me

(via the-dalek-in-221b)

1. You have natural fat. You were meant to be a certain size, whether it was very little of that natural fat, or a lot of it.
2. Be proud of your beautiful/handsome body no matter how it’s shaped or how it jiggles or doesn’t jiggle.
3. You’re face isn’t going to be exactly how you want it to be, and you may not find it attractive, but there is always someone out there who will
4. You’re body isn’t a fucking temple. It’s a cluster of cells for you to do with what you want, whether it be tattoos or piercings or a fuck ton of sex.
5. You can shave or not shave where ever you want. It’s your hair, not anybody else’s.
6. You can be a boy and want to wear a dress or be a girl and want to wear a suit, this goes for non-cis males and females.
7. If you shame someone for being their own person then I hope you wake up one day on the side of a road with your guts strewn about.



it’s just like, why are there cat emojis for loads of emotions as well as normal humans emojis


like, when do i need to express these emotions… but as a cat

they’re not for you… they’re for ME


(via thatoneoboegirl)


you cannot continually perpetuate fat hate and ignore the shit that fat people go through on a daily basis and then expect anyone to feel bad for you because one girl jokingly said “skinny bitches” in a song

(via thescienceofseductionn)


honestly my dad is such a freak he never says goodnight like a normal person he just says “i’ll be back” and he goes upstairs and when you ask where he is or go looking for him hes asleep and the next morning when you see him he just says “good morning im back’ like what is wrong with him

(via officially-official-office)